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What does it say about our lives today, when nearly every Tom, Dick and Harry can claim «celebrity» status? When I flick through my TV remote, I am likely to become privy to a variety of «stars» whose apparent calling completely escapes me. I wonder sometimes, what in the name of glory catapulted some of these «icons of awe» to such prominence – it must be more PR than talent. But however trivial the aptitude, it appears to have spawned a global trend for ordinary people of all generations, sizes and credentials to outperform each other in the forlorn prospect of generating attention.

It goes without say, that it in most cases it is not an option to rely totally on untampered nature, to entice the desirability one craves. Thus, carnal enhancements of all kinds are being acquired by hoards of inconspicuous people, to launch them into the visual arena. Piercings, tattoos, boob and Botox jobs and even designer renovations of the private regions are all available to improve on the basic exterior that mother nature failed to provide.

The classic is of course the breast enlargement, and this is executed on behalf of some of the species with such alarming alacrity, that with repeated surgical interventions, you understand why the bosom was commonly referred to as the bust. My cup runneth over!

Mind you, bottoms are peaking at the moment. I don’t know whether the ladies in question have been studying wildlife too ardently, but their posteriors seem to be taking on proportions closely resembling something from the River Nile. While many of the gentler gender slip in and out of diets, to maintain a streamline torso, others appear to need more cushioning in the rear end and I often wonder how they find clothes to accommodate their titanic dimensions.

Plastic nails and nose restorations seem rudimentary these days, followed by teeth whitening, that leaves the front row looking like twinkling tombstones. Of course, Botox is a must, to fill out the cracks of time and many «prominent» men have also succumbed to the habit in the pursuit of their rejuvenation program. To those who deem to have improved on the original, they may need to take a reality check as they labour their way through facial expressions.

Now, back in the day, tattoos were made for sailors, prisoners and Auschwitz inmates. These days, the ink can’t dry fast enough in the mass of tattoo parlours, with arms, legs, necks and otherwise lining up for the next inspirational masterpiece. So, clothes have to be designed such, that these gems of creativity can be easily exposed and paraded. I am told that many a tourist has awoken worse for wear to a total calamity as they take a maiden view of a tattoo, made in the course of their delirium. Happily, ingenious entrepreneurs have created a new and lucrative, commercial project, correcting this particular form of fracas

Piercings are another source of pure amazement. Pierced ears is one thing, but I often wonder if those people sporting rings through their nose, lips or eyebrows really perceive it as an enhancement to the overall image. The biggest piercing horror has to be the tongue and cheeks. The thought of harbouring a mouthful of metal is nauseating not to mention the risk of infection or damage to the teeth. Genital piercing which appeared in the Karma Sutra, over 2000 years ago, has also found its way to the western world in increasing variations and growing demand. By definition, it’s not a form of piercing generally on display to the public.

In conclusion, I muse on the vision of future care homes, as the residents titillate over their historic artistic acquisitions on their, by then, ripened and wrinkled physiques. The piercings clink together between the folds of their skin and the faded tattoos, shrivelled beyond recognition.

Photo: pexels.com / Clem Onojeghuo

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