{"id":2178,"date":"2024-09-01T19:55:00","date_gmt":"2024-09-01T17:55:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/?p=2178"},"modified":"2025-11-23T20:09:30","modified_gmt":"2025-11-23T19:09:30","slug":"flush-the-frog","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/?p=2178","title":{"rendered":"Flush the Frog"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Flush the Frog<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Once upon a time there was a feisty frog called Flush<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Who still remembered days when he was just a spawny mush<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His life was quite serene before his big metamorphose<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But then it all disrupted with the sounds of a bulldozer<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His marshy habitat became the site of mass destruction<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As nature once more yielded to demands of huge construction<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Twas just as well his baby days were pretty well completed<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And he tackled adolescence with no signs of being depleted<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He\u2019d lost his gills and tail and all the puppy fat as well<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And was bent on facing life and hanging loose for a short spell<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He\u2019d learnt from male ancestors that the golden rule in life<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Was to culture all the trappings to attract a loving wife<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Essentially he\u2019d prove he was much greater than his brothers<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And was totally devoted to outshining all the others<\/p>\n\n\n\n

From reflections in the water he could study his visage<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And make sure that it was perfect and not just a vague mirage<\/p>\n\n\n\n

An enticing kind of virtue was a voice of grand command<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He\u2019d heard amongst the ladies it was still in great demand<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He practised with his larynx to create the kind of voice<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That would render dames quite helpless giving them no other choice<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He learnt the art of breathing, to inflate his vocal sac<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To fill an auditorium, and be heard right to the back<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He trained his vocal pulses to create a sexy quiver<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That could relegate the toughest to a croaking little shiver<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He didn\u2019t need arpeggios or words beyond compare<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Just two specific frequencies when he was on the air<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He learnt the finer art of asking ladies to go dating<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And learnt what not to do if she was frightened of him mating<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A special tone of voice protected him from competition<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His hands were full with her, without a hoard of opposition<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yet another pitch could tell his chums he was in trouble<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Which was easier than calling for their help by blowing bubbles<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another sound could tell his mates they ought to hit the trail<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If their passion had confused Flush with a bit female tail<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But Flush was very far from gay, as any female knew<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And when they got the hots for him they had to join the queue<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Frogs can only recognise the calls of their own class<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Which thankfully eliminates cross-mating in the grass<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Alas for the young females when the temperatures turn chilly<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They answer the wrong mating call and then they look quite silly<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So when he’s finished mating and he <\/strong>seeks his<\/strong> next new flame<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She<\/strong> needs another year until she<\/strong> gets the urge again<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The ladies are restrained when they are summoning a mate<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For fear of luring multitudes and getting in a state<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The men are so expectant that they tackle her like crazy<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And often kill her outright or just leave her feeling hazy<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But not our Flush \u2013he was indeed the Don Juan of our day<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He subdued his carnal cravings in a classy kind of way<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The outcome of this tactic was anything but painless<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Cos Flash enjoyed a status of a man who was quite stainless<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And so the ladies stood in line desiring his affection<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But he was quite indifferent and he tried to use deflection<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The less he was attracted – all the more they flocked around<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Until they turned the tables and had pinned him to the ground<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh fate, oh bitter pill, oh buxom ladies – out the way!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And give me back my dignity and send me on my way\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Poor Flush was disconcerted and mustered up his strength<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To hold these goodly ladies at respectable arm\u2019s length<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The very attributes that he had been so keen to gain<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Had been his certain downfall and produced this hostile pain<\/p>\n\n\n\n

With one big leap he overwhelmed his doting female fans<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And found himself a fugitive in unknown foreign lands<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He scrutinised from far afield a pleasant little dwelling<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And hopped in that direction even though his leg was swelling<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He moved towards the house and found a backdoor just ajar<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He needed a strong fortress like the walls of Alcazar<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He hopped around the confines to confirm the coast was clear<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then settled for the bathroom to assuage his daunting fear<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You see it had no windows and it didn\u2019t seem to him<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That any frogs could penetrate to goad their scared victim<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the meantime he was hungry and dried out beyond belief<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So he hopped right down the toilet to acquire some quick relief<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His cosy little chamber helped to settle his poor nerves<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whilst he vainly cogitated if he\u2019d got his just deserves<\/p>\n\n\n\n

During his reflections he discovered in addition<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A veritable echo in his latest acquisition<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Despite his grave misgivings and a debilitating fear<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He resonated loudly to enjoy the atmosphere<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Quite unbeknown to him there was a resident at home<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Who investigated promptly where the noise was coming from<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It didn\u2019t take her long to find his ludicrous location<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And tried to flush him back down to his journey\u2019s instigation<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Our lady\u2019s name was Kathy and our froggy\u2019s name was Fred<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She instantly re-named him \u201cFlush\u201d in case he ends up dead<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Poor Flush had the sensation of Niagara\u2019s great Falls<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But fought his way back bravely up the hurdles and pitfalls<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Imagine Kathy\u2019s horror and her very great surprise<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To see her little friend again before her very eyes<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She laughed at the analogy reminding her of man<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Our Flush was the proverbial \u201cBig Flush in the Pan\u201d!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She went and fetched a plant pot and retrieved him from the pan<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And gave him back to nature as a full-blown froggy man<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The moral of this story is an interesting plot<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You make a noose for your own neck when trying to be what you are not<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Just stay the way you are and you will find you are endowed<\/p>\n\n\n\n

With all the basic features that will make your parents proud<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Just be yourself and learn to take your life as you were meant<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And everything you need is there \u2013 as if it\u2019s heaven-sent<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n
\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Photo: Pixabay<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Flush the Frog Once upon a time there was a feisty frog called Flush Who still remembered days when he was just a spawny mush His life was quite serene before his big metamorphose But then it all disrupted with the sounds of a bulldozer His marshy habitat became the site of mass destruction As […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":2179,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[187,6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2178","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-animal-kingdom","category-all-topics"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2178","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2178"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2178\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2181,"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2178\/revisions\/2181"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2179"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2178"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2178"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/humble-thoughts.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2178"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}